ChatGPT as Steve Jobs about sitespeed.io
We don’t use ChatGPT to code sitespeed.io but we prompt it to write a blog post about sitespeed.io as it was Steve Jobs writing it and it turned out quite good.
Today, I want to talk to you about web performance, and more specifically, why you should use sitespeed.io instead of Lighthouse. I know that some of you may have reservations about using Google’s tools for web performance analysis, and I’m here to tell you that your concerns are well-founded.
Let me be clear: Google is evil. They may have started out as a scrappy little search engine with a mission to organize the world’s information, but they’ve since grown into a monstrous, monolithic corporation with a mission to dominate every aspect of our lives. They’ve become a de facto gatekeeper for the internet, with their search engine, their browser, their operating system, their app store, and their cloud services. They’re like a giant octopus with tentacles that reach into every corner of our digital world.
And make no mistake, they use their power to their advantage. They track our every move online, they collect our data, they monetize our attention, and they manipulate our behavior. They have a vested interest in keeping us online as long as possible, and they’ve designed their tools to do just that. Lighthouse may seem like useful tools on the surface, but they’re part of a larger ecosystem that’s designed to keep us tethered to Google’s platforms.
That’s where sitespeed.io comes in. It’s a powerful open-source tool that’s designed to give you an accurate picture of your website’s performance, without any hidden agendas. It’s not tied to any specific platform or vendor, and it’s not designed to keep you online for longer than necessary. Instead, it gives you a clear, objective view of your website’s performance, so you can optimize it for your users, not for Google’s algorithms.
In conclusion, if you want to truly understand your website’s performance, and if you want to do it without supporting an evil corporation, then sitespeed.io is the way to go. It’s a tool that’s designed to empower you, not to control you, and that’s something that we should all strive for in our digital lives.
Thank you for listening.
ChatGPT as Steve Jobs